The Roots

Day 4:


So today, I caught myself in the middle of a sentence about saying something negative about myself. I tell you I don't even realize I am doing it. It just comes out. I have had a few realizations about this and possibly the root of why I do this to myself. I realize now that I under appreciate myself. I don't value myself. I don't see myself like others see me. Like I said in one of my first posts, you are your worst critic. I am my worst critic. This realization makes me just ponder when did my thinking first start like this. I don't know when it first started, that I started doubting my abilities, but it happened.


Those thoughts of inadequacy, it's what propels the spiritual warfare. It is what drives the negativity.


It's going to take more time to figure out the root of that issue. Till then, I'll be praying for God's healing and wisdom. He is one amazing and gracious God! 


I prayed today, nothing big, just for protection, while I was driving. I used to think of Jesus riding with me. I take it as a piece of comfort. Plus I always worship in the car. That is always my favorite part of riding in the car going places. My friend said today that music is like praying twice, because you are listening to worship music and singing at the same time. I am going to try real hard and work on praying out loud tonight.


I'm excited about this journey. It is only day 4 and I have already learned so much about myself and more importantly about God.


Lord, 
I praise you for today. It was a great day. I am so glad that you were a part of my day. I enjoyed hanging out and studying with you. Thank you for telling me I am worth more in your eyes than I think in mine. You are so gracious to me and I am very thankful for this. Tonight I pray for the ability to see how you see me. Thank you for being there always. I love you. I pray that everyone has a great day tomorrow and is inspired by the words that are written through YOU. I pray all these things in your name.


Amen.